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Christian, marriage, motherhood, Thankful

May Day

It hit me. May is not my favorite month. In fact, this month gives me the burn/ itch. May holds too many expectations, failed, yet to be fulfilled, and impossible to appropriately meet. 2 of my best friends birthday’s fall in this month. 2 great days to praise God for the gift of their life and the many ways they have made life so much more joyful! Yet they both live far away. Next, we have Mother’s day. We unargueably have the best mothers on the planet. They deserve their own day. But for some reason each year, it always gets sliced weird. They get the mangled crust with a cute homemade gift. Not long enough cards. They deserve the world, and then a week at the spa for all they give to us, all the countless ways they generously love us. Usually the day after or 2, is our Anniversary. May 13. Poor wedding planning on our part. We then have our baby Christian’s Birthday. May 14. A day that brought so much hope last year. Our baby would be one. It would be a bold lie to say anything other than I would give anything to ambien my way through the pain, and sadness this month holds. Celebrating seems so off color. Pressing on in my own strength would be a joke, so God has graciously gifted our family with mothers, fathers, family, friends, brothers and sisters in Christ, pastors, nurses, doctors, teachers to spur us/ me on. To encourage us, and to show us He is here. He is meeting each need before we even have the chance to panic or plan for a solution. He is hearing my heart be poured out before Him and showing me moment by moment how He is going to carry me/ us through. In the times where the suffering is insurmountable-He swiftly gives me the mercy needed to keep breathing. I notice He does this after I see the need. Most of the time, He just gives me what is so unnatural-peace. People I would have never otherwise known, but through His perfect hand, have come alongside me to specifically encourage and fill my heart with His promises and know exactly what scripture to point me to. Hugs, cards, flowers, meals, prayers. People I would have never had the pleasure of knowing had I not endured previous painful trials. And that is so the nature of our big and unsearchable God. Using brokeness, to heal deeper brokeness, to bring us to an ever full and perfect redemption. God will not let me sit here and declare self pity, up in arms at what seems like injustice. This mother’s day my heart is aligned with His and I declare my allegiance to Christ and His work with the life He has breathed into me. He is changing my heart, sustaining me, and giving me far more than I could have ever known to pray for. He is showing me His glory through this recovery and what-feels-like-a-marathon-life-trial. Today I see my God bigger than ever, and worthy of being trusted. I pray that when you look back and take stock of your life and blessings today, you too will see exactly what God has entrusted you with, and the many mercies He has graciously bestowed upon you.

marriage, Thankful


Marriage is a gift. Is it not? If you aren’t crazy about your partner in matrimony at the moment, hang in there. To stop and think-God chose this man for ME. He CHOSE him for me and me for him. Wow. It is a beautiful thing. Granted, I have not been married a lifetime, or let’s be honestā€¦haven’t even crossed the 10 year threshold. Regardless, I think we have been through enough in this life to see the abundant blessing in a marriage renewed by putting our faith in Christ. I happen to LOVE my husband, and if we are being honest, I like him just as much. Yes, we have endured crazy life trials, loss, and ups and downs, but truth be told, we have seen the rainbow more times than we deserve or can possibly begin to count. Our love is true. It is authentic. We love, we argue (sometimes), we depend on eachother, and we are committed. He loves me with grey hair, no hair, some makeup, no makeup, snot bubbles and even my rapidly increasing face wrinkles. He laughs with me, cries with me, and holds my hand always. It is a joy to be “committed” to my hunk of a husband.
Which brings me to my next point in a round about way. In September, an extraordinary photographer, (and very good friend), Josh Elliott, gave us a beautiful gift. I opened the door to a beautiful plant and card letting us know he wanted to gift us a commitment shoot. This is something we would never have been able to splurge on. Which made it even more special to us.
The day started with a surprise professional make up/ hair session Josh arranged, stealth style. No before pictures-sorry peeps. It was ugly. We then met and he began taking a lot of pics. You would think kissing and being all smoochy smoochy would be all awkward in front of a very dear friend-no? Well, it was in fact NOT awkward at all. I am sure the bial was creeping up Josh’s throat, but hey-he is a professional photographer- so he is used to some of this romantical-ness. And he was super professional and made us laugh and stuff. It was fun! Like an engagement session re-do. B/C we were kind of losers the first round. Here is the fruit of his crazy skills. I am not apologizing for flooding the blog with pics of me & my #1. šŸ˜‰

I don’t really know what was so funny, my man is just straight charming. He keeps me laughing always. I love you always Big Stink. Happy Mama. Many, many, many thanks to Josh. You are such a precious friend to us. We love you! I will always look at these pictures with immense gratitude.  xoxo

Photos courtesy of Josh Elliott Photography
Makeup by 10.11 Makeup
Jewelry by g2g designs

Brain, marriage

Happy Hat Hunting

How we spent our Sunday:
looking at hats-fun!
M:”Chad do you like this one?”
M:”What about this one?”
C”No, it looks like it sits too high on your head.”
{repeat for 2 hours}
Yah, that is because my head is fat.

Can I just make a suggestion hat makers of the world? SIZES.  o/s is not acceptable. Even toe rings have sizes, and really-who buys those anymore? There aren’t many of us that actually buy these thingsā€¦but those of us who do want to cover our scalps in style and preferrably by not cutting off the circulation of what is left of our brains.
The end result of this glorious expedition? I am the proud owner of 3 new fedoras and I owe Chad something magical for keeping me company and not telling me my head is fat;) I love you Stink.

marriage, Thankful


I always forget how lifechanging the loud BBQ place Lucille’s is. Until I wake up the next morning all swelled up and 2 inches girthier. Then I remember a bite of that macaroni was in the 150-200 calorie range,  and well, having already gained 15 lbs, I can’t really afford to be eating like that, then planning to run a marathon the next day. Because pee when I run now, and I hate running. Charming, eh?
We had a smashing date night last night just my husband and I, and I have to say, (as I always do 30 times through the night), why don’t we do this more often? Date nights have become a highlight of the week most definitely and after 7 years of being a couple, I am so thankful to say, they are just as fun and appreciated. Of course instead of fumbling under the table playing footsie, we now like to talk grown up and chug our ice waters. And actually, *GASP*, get to finish what we are talking about with out playing whack a mole with a toddler vying for our attention. Just kidding-I don’t whack my midgets. Well, hard at least;)  7 years ago this month was our first date at Lucille’s, where I decided I kinda like the guy.  So, YAY, for Lucille’s. She hasn’t let me down yet.


Marriage Retreat

So last weekend C and I joined our church family for a marriage retreat. Dah-dah-DAH. On the mothership-Queen Mary. What a huge blessing to be able to spend 2 days with full attention on our avocado tree, I mean, marriage. C & I both got a lot out of the weekend, but most appreciated was the last session on God’s love for us. And HOW He loves us, and what the implications of that areā€¦I really needed to hear this. So, thank you Pastor Mike and Carlynn for pouring your hearts out into this weekend. We loved every minute of it.

In the beginning; there was a girl with a cell phone and a can of attitude. We actually fought, (ok bantered) on the way up to a mushy mushy retreat over a series of texts. Whatever. 
 Clearly, I was in the right place.
  After a session on contentment, we hit up this jewel. I wanted gloves, C said no.
John & Amy-everybody together now-“awhhhhh”
 Caesar & Linda – some of our closest friends. You know how I know they love us? They know what a thirteen year old I am and photoshop pictures before putting them on FB. That is what  5 star friends look like: 
 And this one is just precioso.  *Sigh* 

 Pastor Bobby ROCKED IT. He was our emcee/ host. I laughed my way to incontinence. *almost*

 James getting all defensive over ________?
 We played fun games where items of clothing were demanded off. Kind of. Just the shoes. It was good times for sure. But like all team games, C & I were out in round 2 of 8. We had 6 rounds to work out why I am a better driver.
  Pastor M was so gracious to take a picture with me when I looked like a bag lady. Who forgets a brush on a weekend away? ME. He will now always remember me as the vain frump who spazzed out when her husband took a picture. Schweet.
 Pastor Mike and my husband. I totally messed that up. Ergh! C was so excited to get a picā€¦.minus 10 points for Michelle.